A new start

December 21, 2016 § Leave a comment

I am giddy all of a sudden,
What’s that unfamiliar feeling in my tummy?
Butterflies.
I smile when the phone rings,
What’s that unfamiliar flutter in my chest?
Racing Heartbeats.
I giggle at the lame jokes,
What’s that unfamiliar skip in my footsteps?
Unbridled joy.
I see him looking at me,
What’s that unfamiliar look in his eyes?
Pure Adoration.
I feel our hands entwined,
What’s that unfamiliar elation in my heart?
Hope for a new start.

🙂

Healing

November 9, 2016 § Leave a comment

Your world crumbled around you,
but I see the dust settling.
The rest of your life awaits,
Brush the debris off you darling.

Walk away from the catastrophe,
that you almost got yourself into.
He doesn’t deserve your love,
listen to the people saying that too.

Promises don’t mean a thing,
he showed you that didn’t he?
No point in feeling even a shred
of hurt or pain or pity.

You’ll erase him out of your life,
I see that burning conviction in you.
Laughter is already coming easy,
I know the strength will follow too.

You have done nothing wrong,
and so you will NOT hide or run.
That place of despair is left behind,
for the healing has already begun.

Epiphany

August 31, 2014 § Leave a comment

You sit across me in all your splendor,
as I sing out loud the lyrics of the song they’re playing.
You smile in that mysterious way that leaves me breathless
and I’m left wondering if we’re ever going to be together.
I joke about the waiter who never gets our drinks on time
you chortle and join in as if you relate to it all the way.

waiter

I know that you’re silent over dinner for a reason,
I don’t bring it up coz I just want to extend the time we have.
I dunno when I fell for you, maybe it was the talks you and I had.
Maybe it was the jokes you subtly cracked over food,
and the dimples your face bore that sank me to the floor.

I wish the letters I write to you would find their way to you somehow,
and that you’d know how crazy you’ve made me over the time.
But most importantly, I hope you realise my epiphany,
that I’ve fallen for you – truly, madly and deeply
and that I wish that someday – you can be mine…

A Stranger I met

August 11, 2014 § 3 Comments

There was a sense of playfulness
in the way your eyes sparkled.
I loved it when you laughed out loud,
throwing all your inhibitions astray.

There was a sense of urgency
in the way you talked nineteen to a dozen.
I swear, I just lost myself
in your infectious enthusiasm.

There was a sense of mystery
in the way you smiled half shyly.
I ended speechless more than once –
your simplicity just took my breath away!

There was a sense of maturity
in the way you told me of your big plans.
I just couldn’t help but smile
because I could still see the kid in you.

There was a sense of adoration
in the way you held my hand chastely.
I was just so giddy with happiness
that you and I were together.

There was a sense of irony
that we were so alike in being.
It’s still hard to believe,
I fell for a stranger whom I just met!

The lighthouse memoirs

May 29, 2012 § 5 Comments

My grandma was a phenomenal woman. I have many beautiful memories of my childhood summers preserved in her warm embrace. By the time the sun set on her life, she was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s; that wretched disease that snatches your memories away from your grasp and you are utterly powerless to do anything about it. To think that all those beautiful events, of loved ones, of family, just lost, scattered away into nothingness makes me wish this misery doesn’t befall any one.

She passed away some months back, peacefully among the people who loved her and reminded her of that love till the very end.

[EDIT : This poem is about her. I tried to put in some fiction into it at first, but it didn’t really turn out the way I wanted it to. So I changed the version. The title still remains “The lighthouse memoirs” because I still feel, her memory kept playing hide and seek till the end, like the escaping beam of a lighthouse.]

The pot starts boiling on the stove,
she doesn’t know what she’s making.
She struggles to decipher the aroma,
yet her hands keep up the stoking.
Her furrowed brows and dazed eyes
stare at her tiny bottles of spice.
Once she was known to invent recipes,
today she has trouble boiling rice.
She walks in her quaint old kitchen,
slightly happy but mostly confused.
Who, what, where, how?
She’s faintly disturbed by the questions.

She sees faces all around her
every second of every minute of every hour.
They sit with her and talk about the past,
but that’s just incoherent speeches for her!
They take her tiny withered hand in theirs,
give her a reassuring warm squeeze.
She is surrounded by gentle warm smiles,
her grandchildren’s laughters fill up the alleys.
She looks on at all the hoopla,
slightly amused, mostly baffled.
Who, what, where, how?
She’s can’t seem to grasp it anymore.

She hobbles up the steps of the temple,
each step surprisingly more agile than the last.
She spends a few minutes with her Maker,
and the morning prayers breaks her fast.
She bows her head, hands folded together,
and seeks pardon for forgetting some verses.
Tomorrow will be better she promises,
I’ll chat with you once everyone disperses.
She looks on at His big round eyes
slightly sad, mostly humbled.
Who, what, where, how?
She feels scared of the questions now.

She got phonecalls from people far away,
I don’t know if she could recollect their voice.
On the rare days when she’d be lucid,
her mumbling speech would resonate of rejoice!
She rarely came out of her room by the end,
but her family tended to her every need.
Sadly, on the last day she lived,
her memory lost the chance to succeed.
I look at her old pictures sometimes,
slightly upset, mostly missing her.
the questions will always be there,
but I wish we never forget the ones we love.

The eternal dream

April 21, 2012 § Leave a comment

The night drapes itself around her,
and the calming silence prevails.
She closes her eyes and drifts away,
as the dreams for the night unveils.

The skies are cloudy as far as the eye sees,
the onset of showers the sky declares.
If only he would’ve been here right now,
She’d get him soaked despite his glares.

The sweet redolence of the wet earth,
reminds her of the smell of his cologne.
The thunder booms over her head,
and she remembers his soft low baritone.

She smiles at her silliness and shakes her head,
Dreams won’t make his presence cohere.
Imagine her shock as she sees him next to her,
as if her dreaming actually made him appear!

It’s an ironical dream she witnesses tonight,
coz she loves the rains and she knows he doesn’t.
She couldn’t imagine what this might lead to,
so she continues delving and being patient.

The clouds get closer, lightening strikes!
She awaits his reaction to the rains he abhors.
Alas! He takes her hand and walks her to it,
and they both get drenched down to their cores.

She stares at his peaceful demeanor in surprise,
the water droplets adorning his perfect face.
His hand still holding hers, he looks at her
“I could get used to this” that’s all he says.

She laughs in joy seeing his beatific smiles,
her racing heart actually skips a beat or two.
As he engulfs her in his arms, her laughter ceases,
She somehow knows it’s the last hug before his adieu.

Still smiling radiantly he withdraws from her,
Slowly walks back, his outline fading away.
His presence is a dream but her pain is real,
as she begs him “For tonight, can you please stay?”

He waves at her as he recedes from sight,
his grin now too difficult for her to follow.
So she closes her eyes and listens to him instead,
“Don’t be sad my love, you’ll see me tomorrow.”

She notices it’s blissfully quiet all of a sudden,
No clouds in the horizon, no thunder no rain.
Just a happy feeling deep down in her heart,
she wonders if it’s hope replacing the pain.

He’s not a ghost, he’s not her hallucination,
he’s not an illusion whatever her actions may imply.
For tonight she’s happy meeting him in her dreams
coz she’s not ready just yet… to bid him goodbye.

The love story

November 12, 2011 § 3 Comments

Miles away from home,
She undertakes a solitary journey.
The rain soaks her to the bone.
Lightening tears the inky black sky.
She doesn’t falter, she doesn’t stop.
A thunderstorm is on its way.

Miles away from civilization
Away from the lies, the false promises.
She trudges resolutely on a mission.
But, she knows she’s not alone.
Every step is being watched, scrutinized.
it’s real like the pulse in her veins.

Miles away from sanity,
They keep up the pretenses, him and her.
Yet as their silence overpowers the thunders,
she pauses for sliver of a moment.
His eyes glint against the dark night sky.
Yes, the stalker is back.

Miles away from the world she knew,
Realization hits; It’s time for a chat.
The air around him reeks of betrayal.
Yet courage goads her on.
What do you want? she dares to ask.
Your destruction, he calmly replies.

Miles away from everything reasonable,
“You’ve scarred me enough already,
What more can you take”, She wonders aloud.
His once handsome lips curve into a sneer.
The devil is back she tells herself,
Only the sacrifice of her soul will suffice.

Miles away from any soul living or dead,
Mumbling a prayer, she reaches into her robe,
Fingers clasped tight around something bright.
His cold eyes never left the sight of her palm,
“Why did this happen?” was her tearful farewell,
As she lets go of his ring and to her life she bids adieu.

Miles away from heaven and hell,
on the mortal’s land they met today.
Eons ago the Devil fell for an angel.
All logic and reason were knocked aside,
what was forbidden became the reality,
And that’s how their love story once began.

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